Not every wedding
unites just two people who want to make a life together. Many times
a wedding creates a whole new family.
When one or both parties brings at least one child
to the union, a new family is begun. Speaking from experience, I
know blending families can be a tricky business! Just because the
two adults have fallen in love, doesn't mean that everybody else
involved has fallen in love with each other, too. The wedding
doesn't automatically mean that everybody is now magically just
one big happy family.
Including the children
in the wedding ceremony helps them feel that they are important,
and that their feelings matter. It may also help them accept that
the new stepparent is committed to them and to the success of the
family. Therefore, many couples with children choose to include family
vows in their wedding ceremony, as well. Often times a special token
is also exchanged with the children, such as a medal or family ring,
that symbolizes the new family being created.
At Joyful Promises, we can help you craft the kind
of family vows that are meaningful for you and your children as you
begin your new life together as a couple and as a family.
The concept of a Handfasting is said
to have originated with the ancient Celtic culture. With the peasant
class, a Handfasting was often used instead of a wedding because
the couple was not wealthy enough to require a marriage contract,
since there usually was no dowry to arrange for.
Conversely with the nobility class, a Handfasting
was used almost like a modern day prenuptial agreement. The Handfasting
was used to signify the betrothal of the couple before the business
of the dowry and entitlement was worked out.
|Today a Handfasting
can be used in a number of ways. It can be used to
signify an engagement or betrothal. Laws being as they are today,
a Handfasting is an excellent way for a gay or lesbian couple to
make their commitment known. Handfasting may be the ceremony of choice
for Wiccan or pagan couples, as well. Additionally a Handfasting
can be added to any wedding ceremony to symbolize "tying the
as a universal wedding theme.